Thursday, September 30, 2010

Wordless, er, Thursday.

(I just realized that today is Thursday. This is how my week has gone! HA!)
OK, a few words. This was taken by the amazing Julie. It is one of my favorites.

OK, wait, this one may be my favorite.

Ok I could do this all day. I love them all!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Soccer, Volleyball, and a Cute Baby

We had a crazy weekend. Garrett had two soccer games in NWA Saturday morning. We had to get up early and drive up there. He played in the field the first game and goalie the second game. Let's just say the second game was tough. He was so discouraged when he left the field. They scored several times. Goalie is just a hard position to play. The big Hog vs. Alabama game was this weekend and we were leaving NWA about the time everyone else was heading to the field. I don't think you could have paid me enough money to be on the other side of that interstate! It was insane!

There was a very cute little cheerleader cheering her brother on. It was actually cool enough to wear her jeans and a jean jacket. I bought her some 12 month jeans. They are too tight. I had to unbutton them so she could sit comfortably! Ha!

Gracie has started volleyball. She is just learning, but she is doing great! Blurry pics, but you get the idea!

Also, someone went and straightened up Evan grave. I went back to do it and the flowers were in a good spot and had been fixed and the wind-chimes had been moved and it just looked better. I don't know who did it, or if they read my blog, but thank you.

Friday, September 24, 2010

It's Friday - I'm in love

Week 28. I don't care if they are blurry, out of focus, or in bad light ~ I am showing off her amazing smile! We went to the doc today and she is a healthy BIG girl! 27.5 inches and 23 lbs 3 oz. She is off the curve for both again. Her weight is more of a line upward than a curve, but he said that was fine for now. Right now I am just trying to soak her in and enjoy what I have.

Just one more of her doing what she does a lot lately ~ eating her toes!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Just Rambling.

This is just going to be a long rambling post. I just need to get this stuff out. I probably need a journal. ha. Evan's headstone has been placed. I am sad. I mean, I wanted it placed, but it just seems so final now. really final. My son's name is on a headstone. I drove past just to see if it had been placed and had to walk out there. They had just thrown the flowers I put out the other day on their side and I wanted to fix them. I was not prepared in the least to go out there and see that. I left Carolina in the car because it is hard to put the garden picks in the ground while holding her. I left pretty upset. I just kind of looked back to make sure she was ok and cried my way home. When I went to get her out of the car, her face lit up and she smiled that amazing smile at me. I could not help but smile back. This morning at Bible study they asked the question "Who has Jesus been for you this week" most women gave their answer with an explanation. I gave may answer with a shaky voice and did not explain for fear of breaking down uncontrollably. My answer was that He has been my comforter. I have just been having a really hard time lately and Isaiah 61 just keeps coming up. It is just in my head all the time. So when Carolina smiled at me "to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion— to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning..." was in my heart. I am still so sad, but He gave me beauty from ashes. It is a lot to put on a little girl, but I think she handles it well. Anyway. I am an emotional mess. I have my good minutes, and my bad minutes. And it is kind of sad that I feel I am going minute to minute again. Hopefully I will dig my way out soon.

Love This

Julie posted more of Carolina's pics on her blog. I so love these!

Friday, September 17, 2010

Thursday, September 16, 2010


I posted this one year ago today. It is hard to imagine that Carolina was just a tiny little baby in my belly then. Now, she is a big baby. It is also 18 months since we said goodbye to Evan. I am having somewhat of a pity party today. Yesterday was not good either, but home group helped. We picked out and paid for Evan's stone 3 or 4 weeks after he passed away, and it has still not been placed. We have just gone round and round with the monument company. I went out there yesterday to put the fall flowers on his grave and I really expected to see the stone. I thought we had everything worked out and it would be placed. It was not there. I was devastated. Every time I have to call it just throws me in a depression. This is the last detail that needs to be taken care of and I just cannot get it done. I understand we picked a stone that takes a long time to come in, I understand that we asked for a revision on the design, I understand that the person we were communicating with quit and no one was reading her email anymore. I just want it placed please. I just need this done please. It is painful.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Middle Child

I haven't posted much about Garrett lately. He does not really like to get his pic taken. Poor kid cannot fake smile to save his life and I think it kind of stresses him out to try to smile for the camera. Anyway. Garrett is in the middle of soccer season. He had a tournament this weekend, and he played so hard! His face while he plays cracks me up. He is so intense. Garrett is a wild and crazy kind of kid. He talks, loudly, and a lot! He is also extremely sensitive and sweet. He makes sure we do not leave Evan out. If someone says we have 2 girls and one boy, he will point out that he has a brother. Sometimes it is kind of hard on us, and other times it is really sweet. Anyway. I just have not posted about him in a while. I love his freckles and hazel eyes. He has the most amazing eyes, and the red hair. Love the red hair.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Six Months

My amazingly talented friend took Carolina's six month pics last night. She posted a sneak peek on her blog this morning and I am so excited! Julie has photographed some of the most treasure photo I have of my family. Thank you, Julie. really. thank you!

Friday, September 10, 2010

It's Friday - I'm in love

Week 26. She will be six months old on Sunday. Six months! Anyway. She is starting to go from sitting up to on her tummy without hurting herself. I still don't really trust her sitting up by herself because we have hardwood and if she falls it will hurt. I usually have the boppy around her or I am sitting with her. She still does not really like her jumper all that much. She pretty much would like me to hold her 24/7, but that really does not let me do anything! ha! She is getting better about her afternoon nap. If she gets a good 3 hours in she is so happy! I just wish she understood that and didn't fight it so much! She really is a good happy baby, just a little demanding! ha! She has her six months pics on Sunday with Julie and I can not wait. Julie also made her this cute bib with the left overs from her bedding. Yes, Julie also made her bedding! I don't know what I would do without Julie!

18 Months

He is 18 months old today. I just cannot believe it. Sometimes it seems like a lifetime ago, sometimes it seems like yesterday. I miss my baby boy. I can remember the sound his little broken heart made and I just cannot fathom that his little heart, that would beat faster when he heard his daddy's voice, or when we played with his feet, just is not beating anymore. I miss him.

So i will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All my life
And i will praise the one who`s chosen me
To carry you

-I Will Carry You - Selah

Friday, September 03, 2010

It's Friday - I'm in love

Week 25. We have had a rough day today. She must be teething or something. Lots of fussing and not a lot of sleeping. I took these pics while we were sitting in the floor playing, but I think they are pretty cute. The past three nights she has not gotten up at 3am. She is staying asleep until we start getting up in the morning. Maybe she is trading her naps for sleeping all night! ha!
And I have to add (My high school English teacher would LOVE the fact I started a sentence with and) I love the fact that the whole time I was trying to take pics, she was trying to chew on strap for the camera!